2018 World Cup Outcast Overview — Second Round Of Group Games — DANGER, DANGER, HIGH VOLTAGE
A first round of shocks was followed by a second round that… Followed suit. The World Cup never fails to deliver. Even the bad games are preferable to American Handegg or the best episode of Coronation Street.
And following a tumultuous first round, the hosts got on with it by getting through to the round of sixteen, bum-rushing Egypt with three goals in fifteen minutes to see of the Pharaohs, but not before everyone’s third favourite player, Mo Salah, scored for the Africans.
Saudi Arabia had a better showing… I guess. They eventually succumbed to a 1–0 defeat to Uruguay, and… That was that. Russia are really holding up Group A on the entertainment front.
Group B wasn’t too thrilling either. Portugal lived up to their billing of most boring team on the planet in a 1–0 win over Morocco, before Spain and Iran played out a decent encounter, but when the highlight comes from an Iranian throw-in, you know you haven’t witnessed a cracker.
No-one starts off cheering Australia (Australians, maybe), but as the tournament progresses, everyone is. There’s something about them that’s endearing, and I’m yet to meet anyone not slightly excited by the fact that their World Cup hopes are still alive after a 1–1 draw with Denmark. Lovely goal from Eriksen in that one.
I picked France to win, and I dunno if I’m regretting it, as they relied on luck to see off Peru 1–0. Get Vikash Dhorasoo on there. Sort ’em out.
In Group D, Lionel Messi has the right to be pissed off. This Argentina team are not gelling. Sampaoli has reportedly been asked to step down immediately following the shock 0–3 defeat to Croatia that saw them through. The Argies have to get through the Nigerians to stand any chance.
Speaking of the Nigerians, they remembered they were at the World Cup and actually played a game of football! Sadly, it was against everyone’s second nation, Iceland. After Ahmed Musa showed Leicester why they bought him with his combo of pace and precision, Dragon-Scouser Gylfi missed a pen. Which means judgment day is coming.
Group E was draaaaaama. Brazil did not beat Costa Rica in 90 minutes and still won 2–0. 90+1 and 90+3 were the minutes in which Coutinho and Neymar saw off the North Americans.
Serbia looked solid against the Swiss, 1–0 win in the bag. NO, banger from Xhaka. Draw? NO, ridiculous break from Shaqiri. Shame. Shame… Too much politics going on here n’all.
You wanna talk drama? HOLY HELL, GROUP F HAD IT IN SPADES. Yeah, yeah, Mexico beat South Korea 2–0, decent performance. BUT, GERMANY ARE GOING HOME. YES THEY ARE. Wait… Wait… WAIT! TONI KROOS, 95th MINUTE, HOLY MOSES, JESUS MARY. What a game. Sweden took the lead, a sumptuous chip from Spanish Hello Toivonen, but everyone’s fourth best mate Marco Reus would equalise before an orgasmic set-piece from Germany won it to restore the hopes of the nation. Everyone who picked Germany to win can rest easy. Zur zeit…
Group G’s second go-round started off in a big way if a little understated with a luffly 5–2 win for Belgium over Tunisia. Lukaku got a brace, as did Hazard, Batshuayi should have scored six, Sunderland legend Khazri got one right at the end, just after Kevin Kilbane said that he never liked him, and a luffly man named Dylan Bronn got a luffly header. And a Tunisian player threw up on the pitch.
THREELIONSONASHIRT, we’re gonna win the World Cup. Panama went for a risky approach in the first half by reminding the English that World Of Sport was back on their TV. Great refereeing by finally calling all the wrestling in the box, but CAN WE JUST FOCUS ON THE 6–1 WIN FOR ENGLAND. So much misery in the past few years, a Harry Kane hat-trick will keep us ticking along for years.
Group H was definitely the group of life and it proved it once again in the second round of group games. Senegal and Japan played out a wildly competitive, entertaining 2–2 draw, while Poland’s hopes of a World Cup were dashed by a 0–3 thrashing at the hands of Colombia. I had Poland finishing top of this group… Darn.
Now we’re really underway. Last round of group games coming up. It’s getting down to the nitty-gritty, and we’re about to say goodbye to half the teams, with Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Morocco, Peru, Costa Rice, Tunisia, Panama and Poland already biting the dust.
Group H and Group E had two cracking games, and the entertainment came from the second half of groups, but for sheer entertainment value, it’s gotta be Belgium-Tunisia 3rd, Germany-Sweden 2nd, and there may be some bias, but England 6–1 Panama was magical. From the wrestling to the 5–0 half-time score, it was a cracking watch, with an actual football-playing second half. But I shouldn’t have to give you credit for that, Panama.
Keep it streets ahead,
CLR
